Most perplexing - Tree of Life – overlong,
over-ponderous and expensive. What were
they trying to say?
Most predictable American
action guff - Olympus
has Fallen –but does contain some good plane bits and explosions.
Action film with most actual
actors who should know better
- Reds 2 - including the magnificent John Malkovitch
Funniest gangster
flick - The
Family – a very funny caper
Best tour of less
salubr3ious parts of downtown LA
- Rampart – oh the pathos
Best Sly and
Arnie caper -
Escape Plan – ridiculous and entertaining
Most
enjoyable Viking romp
- Hammer of the Gods – crying out for a part 2
Best movie with just one actor
- All is Lost
– although I found it hard to identify with the character
Best Flash and shiny - Now You See Me - daft but definitely
shiny
Close second - The Bling Ring –those kids
received very harsh justice indeed for nicking a few trinkets off celebs who
probably got the stuff free in the first place
Best Brit flick -
Starred Up - good story and very engaging
Funniest Brit
flick -
Bronson - fuck off!
Best Low budget Brit flick - Dead in France – very funny but
a bit messy in places and dodgy dialogue
Close second - The Estate – strangely, the quality
improved as it went along
Best film set in
Yorkshire –
the Selfish Giant – excellent child acting but felt the original story was somewhat
lost
Best low budget American
film - King of
California - an excellent Michael Douglas in rare low budget mode
Most amusing Horror - Thirst – odd but entertaining Korean vampire priest romp;
quite funny but not sure if it was meant to be
Best British
vampire film -
Byzantium – quite good vampire tale; much better than I expected
Most disturbing - Julia’s Eyes- Del
Torro creeps you out
Most convoluted
ghost story -
the Awakening – keep up!
Best Historical film - Here there be Dragons – a tale
of the Spanish civil war which doesn’t take sides
Best
Russian war film - Stalingrad –pretty good especially the set decor. But is needlessly bookended by narration saying
how great Russia was
Best Greek epic - 300, rise of an empire –
superior to the first instalment but crying out for part 3
Best sci-fi
sequel -
Riddick – including a rather cool sort-of-dog and ace scenery
Most disappointing
Sci-fi -
Gravity - what was it trying to say?
Close second - Elysium – okay but could have been much better and they should
have killed all the rich people
Best sci-fi mish-mash - Pacific Rim - like Del Toro
had slammed together bits from all his other films with some Michael Biehn and
Godzilla thrown in for good measure
Most weird mish-mash of technologies - Outpost 11 –
very weird low budget do
Best alien - The Arrival of Wang - unusual
Italian sci-fi offering with an unexpected twist
Close second - Under the Skin - odd low
budget alien in Scotland
Most likely to come
true –
Transcendence – this will probably happen soon
Weirdest since
Brazil - the
Zero Theorem - Terry Gilliam practically remakes his old classic
Best 1940’s
sci-fi - On
The Beach - good but very odd
Most
disappointing baddie
– Maleficent – not really evil at all
Best feel good movie - Good Vibrations - funny and
entertaining
Best retelling of
Shakespeare - Caesar
must die – play in a play in an Italian prison
Best heist film - 11.6 –French heist film based
on a real story
Best hats - The Light Thief - nice
gentle film from Kyrgyzstan with excellent hats
Oddest
Arty film - Dogville
– odd Von Triers effort done like a play with minimal props. Very long and with an unexpected end. Good closing titles of old photos to strains
of Young Americans
Best black comedy
Western - Dead
Man – From 1995, the cast includes Johnny Depp, Iggy Pop, and Robert Mitchum. Very funny and atmospheric
Best Faustian
Western - Dead
in Tombstone - silly but entertaining
Best Marvel movie
- Guardians of
the Galaxy – fun and fabulous
Worst
remake -
Robocop - absolutely terrible! How did
they manage to make it so bad? - They took all the fun out of it!
Needless remake -
Carrie - Just
like the original
Best blast from the past - Top Gun – best line: ‘your ego
is writing cheques that your body can’t cash’ – genius!
Just why did I
watch this again? - Sweeney
Todd - I think I just needed to make sure I had not made it up. I had not: Johnny Depp definitely sings like
he got lessons off David Bowie and there really are some truly awful songs too especially
‘Pretty Women’. Makes you want to poke your ears out.
